I’m pretty sure we captured her first heartbreak on video.

We did a gender reveal with the kids and Grace bit into her cupcake first.

“Aww” she said with a disappointed swing in her voice.

And we knew it was a boy.

We all laughed and chattered in bewilderment at yet another boy roommate. She had been giggling out of nervousness but when I looked over again she could no longer keep the corners of her mouth up. It fell, hard…and the tears welled up in her eyes.

She had wanted a baby sister so badly.

I turned off the camera and Jared pulled her into his arms. She began to sob and just couldn’t stop. He took her in the other room and a few minutes later I went in to check on them.

“You know what sweetheart” I whispered to her,  “we all would have loved for this baby to be a girl. But you know what it means that it’s a boy? It means that you are our one and only. You are our special girl.”

And I’m telling you that I meant it with every fiber of my being.

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She’s one in a million. She can be shy but she’s the oldest sibling so she’s also a natural born leader.

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She’s giving…of her love, her hugs, her smiles, her treats and sweets and toys.

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Nature girl. With bows in her hair and painted nails she’ll make habitats for stuffed animals out of grass and mud and water.

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 Music lover. Hates when I make her practice but once she gets a song down she wants to play it over and over and over…

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Sometimes the energy is overwhelming and out of control…like bedtime. And often it’s plain hard and I feel like she’s lost in her head somewhere and my voice is drown out. But sometimes the energy is beautiful and infectious.

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 She is my only daughter. And my heart literally stops sometimes when I look at her.

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Holes in her tights, a lose tooth she refuses to pull, rubber bands on her wrists that she stole from me.

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Head in the clouds.

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Perfection.

xoxo my sweet, sweet girl.